Mind Heist
Checklist
2011 Resolutions
- Have an adventure
- Move out of Florida
- Go on a gaming binge
- Start/Finish projects
- Stop getting rejected
- Buy milk and snacks for work
- Learn the difference between a Resolutions list and a To-do list
“You’re New Year’s Guy!”
This wasn’t my first rodeo, but New Year’s Eve was one for the diary journal record books.
——–
This is what I remember:
Pregame…Shots of tequila, glass of champagne, and an African alcoholic beverage
In the car…A bottle of Coors Light
At the bar/club/lounge…Another Coors Light and an Irish Car Bomb
…I African American’d out.
I start to come to after vomiting and being escorted off the property. Not shoved, or pushed, luckily. But just told that I need to be doing that elsewhere.
I didn’t have my cell phone, my wallet, or my jacket.
I recall leaning over things for support. Walking aimlessly down streets, saying to myself, “Get back to the car.” And then saying, “Really wish I knew where we parked.”
My mind was literally racing a mile a second.
Trying to comprehend what was going on, the fact that my own sister abandoned me, and where the hell did we park?!
I was led back to the bar…
I recall sitting down on the curb/ground and a woman coming up to me. She wasn’t alone, but her face is the only thing I could really make out.
“Are you alright?” she said.
“Yeah, yeah,” I replied.
“Do you need help?”
“No, no, I’m good,” I managed to get out.
“My name is Jennifer. I live right there. That’s my condo. This isn’t sexual. Are you sure you don’t need help?” she kindly asked.
“Yeah, yeah, I’m good.”
Not too long after that I actually tried looking for her again, but it was a condo among many other condos. Plus, being chopped up and sold for parts weren’t on my To-do list that night.
I was led back to the bar…
A bar employee saw me and asked, “Yo, you need help?”
I told him, “Yeah!” and that my sister abandoned me. He asked for a number he could call. I gave him my sister’s (I actually realized the next day that I gave him a combination of both my sisters’ phone numbers). He got a taxi for me, spotted me $20 and reconfirmed with me that I did have cash at my house.
Cab driver relentlessly made sure to keep me conscious. Asking me questions and triple checking to make sure I did have cash at home. After almost throwing up in his car (using his restaurant to-go box as a catcher), being scolded by the cabby for not letting him know we passed my house, we finally made it. I gave him a $100 (it was $88), locked the door, set my alarm for 9:50AM (had work at 12PM), and passed out.
The next morning…
10:36AM – Alarm didn’t go off. Forgot to actually turn it on. The night’s clothes are hung up on hangers, no sign of my sister or her boyfriend, my car is at my sister’s boyfriend’s place, work at 12PM, and the meanest hangover I’ve ever had.
(Throw up, throw up, throw up)
Looked at my wrist, there’s a wristband…? Reads, “Drynk.” “What the…? I thought we went to Cheap? How the fuck did I end up at Drynk?!”
——–
Sister and her boyfriend’s perspective:
I drank something called, “The Dumpster,” which consists of a Long Island Ice Tea and a can of Red Bull.
I handed my sister my jacket which had my cell phone and wallet in the pockets so I could go dance.
I was break dancing.
I danced with 3 girls at the same time.
I took pictures with random girls.
They lost me around 1AM.
Side comments:
I don’t know how to break dance.
The 3 girls weren’t part of the “random picture taking girl” bunch.
1AM?! That means for 3 hours I was running around doing who knows what?!
——–
I’m not gonna lie and say it wasn’t awesome having my own “The Hangover” movie. If I had my camera on me it surely would have been epic.
But fuck. 3 hours?!
And you, nice girl who asked to assist me. Jennifer, if you ever come across this blog/entry, I just want to say thank you for being so kind. Maybe I’ll run into you again someday 😉
Cab driver. You stole from me. Bar employee gave you $20, which means I should have only owed you $68. Start of a new year and you did that?! Maybe I’ll run into you again someday >=|
Cheers to you, 2011!
2rd 